You are probably aware since May 2012 I have been posting all my posts on 2 different blogs one here and one at blogspot.

As of today I am only going to be posting there – I have my fingers crossed you will come over and join me there.

If you’re an email kind of follower you can  still do that there – just sign up on the box on the right like you did on this one.

and you can comment with a google account, or anonymously (but please leave your name) or choose Name/URL and just add your name and email and leave the other bit blank….. okay???

Some of you have been here since I first posted on Jan 1st 2010 and I want to say thank you so much for your kind words and your enthusiasm as I started – I hope I have improved along the way – even if my grammar hasn’t.

Here’s to a new year, to new possibilities and to Hope.

Thanks so much my wordpress friends

Please join me here at Create Hope Inspire (see I made biscuits to welcome you??)

Miriam xxxx

I felt my word for the year was contentment and I feel like to a great degree that is the word that settled over my heart and my home. I came to greater peace and satisfaction with the roles in my life – the mother I am and I am aiming to become, the craft-er and sew-er I am, the person I am in the body I occupy.

In my blog I managed 52 posts about Becoming the Mama I Want to Be,

52 Wardrobe Wednesday posts and

52 Make My Week posts.

All of which have been a great delight to do and none have felt like a chore.

I want to thank you for being on the journey with me this year and I hope you will continue to add your voice of encouragement and find this to be a place of joy and encouragement in 2013.

Tomorrow I’ll let you know my hopes and aspirations for the new year.

 Miriam xx

Through the whole of the advent swap I was so blessed by the thoughtfulness, creative talent and heart-felt generosity I undeservedly received from Leonie.

Day 23

 This AMAZING cushion. I have such a thing about Suffolk Puffs and this one has so inspired me to make myself some more puff-craft.

and more beads I love

The boys received their final installment of our nativity pieces

Day 24:

 The boys were given these gorgeous pillow case covers with PJ pockets and handles for transporting to story telling spots and sweet golden books too.

and I received this stunningly beautiful hand-made necklace (which I then planned my Christmas outfit around) and this incredible hand-made bag – can you imagine the hours and hours of stitching that went into this???

Christmas Day:

The boys received gorgeous books and these stunning hand-made place mats (Bounce has decided it’s rather too good for that and it is actually a quilt for his teddy)

and I received this amazing cook book which I have looked at wistfully before

and my own hand made tu-tu/ petticoat. You can bet I am already planning an outfit based around this gorgeous piece of loveliness.

Leonie (ever generous) also sent a gift for The Atlas – unfortunately we had a letter box break in on Christmas Eve so I am really, really hoping it was not in there at the time…..praying instead it has been caught up in the backlog of Christmas post along with another gift that was due to arrive for another family member.

I cannot begin to really describe how special and humbled I have felt throughout December and even more special I have had the pleasure of meeting Leonie and I have her now as a new and amazing friend. I am blessed and blissed!! )

Christmas Eve PJs

This week I include some things I haven’t shared because I didn’t want to spoil Leonie’s surprises in the Advent swap or I just ran out of space to share because I made something else that week too, or I didn’t share because I did them for Wardrobe Wednesday (like I did this week).

So for your viewing pleasure the final random installment of things I made over the year.

I’d love to do a montage of all the things I made but unless I feel highly motivated in the next couple of days it isn’t going to happen – and actually just now I’m highly motivated to start making new things for 2013 and to sort out and de-clutter my little sewing room.

Advent Gifts for Leonie

I don’t think there are any linkies going on this week so I’m just all here by myself with you for wonderful company.

Don’t you love this little sheep? His costume zips from top to bottom at the back….

This week we got up with the boys (6.30am!!!!) and watched a Christmas movie together. Our boys go to bed really early so a movie after tea is not an option. So instead I got uncomfortable – I hauled myself out of bed when I could have slept in (hello holidays!) and instead of them watching it alone we watched together and then afterwards we talked about what we liked and what made us laugh.

I acted excited to get out of bed when they came in all excited and shiny eyed in the morning…. and actually I enjoyed myself! Sometimes for me the barrier is my own laziness and when I get over this I am always the better for it.

Being together on a special occasion creates such a sense of team and love. It’s never a waste of time. Never.( I didn’t take photos you really don’t need to see me at this time of the day!)

I have so enjoyed this series this year and you have no idea how much your encouragement has meant to me. I have such a passion for people and families to love and enjoy each other and the thought that someone else might find this space helps/encourages them to do the same gives me such joy.

In 2013 I will continue this series on a Monday – including a linky so that you can help me to encourage, be encouraged and resource each other. I would love to have your input too.

And I have made a button – cue huge gasp! With help and direction and here it is )

And he will be called Emmanuel – meaning God with us.

 This Christmas this is the part of the story that captures my heart – God with Us.

Day Sixteen (and a gorgeous Ingrid Michelson CD which is in the car)

Day Seventeen

I’m a lucky girl right??

Day Eighteen – the boys were outside at 7.05am with their chalk pens!

Day Nineteen

If you are keen to see what I’ve been sending (not as exciting!) you can find some posts over here on Leonie’s lovely blog ) 

Day Twenty

Day Twenty-One

and these awesome DIY decorations that are now proudly on the tree

Day Twenty-Two (and the wise men have arrived for our magnetic nativity)

 For those heading off on Christmas travels this weekend I pray safety in the journey and joy in the reception. Merry Christmas lovely friends xxx

Me: Have you had enough water to drink today?

 Bounce: I’ll just go and check (goes to the toilet for a pee)

 Bounce: No I haven’t (because the wee wasn’t clear)

 He then has some water and races back to the toilet to check, but finds he’s all out of wees

 Bounce: I didn’t think there was any left

I think 4-year-old boys are rad.

They have also discovered the delights of sprinkler running and hose chasing over the last few days.

There is always so much to be grateful for but this week I am grateful that it is holiday time and I have my 3 favourite boys home to enjoy the festive season with.

Joining in with the ever grateful and interesting Meghan

My concept was to make silhouettes (am I the only one who finds it impossible to spell that word??) of my boys faces with the things that they love surrounding them – kind of like what is inside their heads is now outside and around. One for my number lover and one for my vehicle lover.

I think they will love them – super easy to make I might do a tutorial if anyone is interested.

Joining in with this lovely new crafty linky and out creative spaces too.

I have been thinking so much about these families – the searing loss, the aching and I so recognise how easy it is to respond in fear. To worry for my children, for the people who inhabit the world they are growing into, to fear the diseases, the dangers, the predators….. but even though that might motivate me (for a time) to love and cherish my children more it is not where I want to parent from.

Fear

Obligation

Guilt

These are the words I want to banish from my parenting. These words, their feelings, the actions they motivate – these are not the mama I want to become.

Fear, when we allow it to set up camp – controls us, it robs us, it makes us cling to children where we should be throwing them in the air, cheering at their attempts to learn new skills, it makes us hold them back from the world they need to experience (I’m not talking about unsafe risks, I’m talking about the joys – and sometimes pains – of being a child). Too many children in many places are robbed of their chance to experience childhood, skinned knees and all. I will not let my fear rob my children of their opportunity.

Obligation – along with its long-suffering companion the heavy sigh - is robbing mama’s of being the mama they long to be. So busy having to do this, should be doing that, ought to have done……. maybe it’s abandoning the home baking this week, or leaving the dishes in the sink or ‘forgetting’ homework for a night. Parenting out of obligation just leads done a very slippery slope to resentment. It does mean the physical needs are met but don’t for a second be fooled that an obliged parent is giving or receiving joy from her family.

Guilt – I have made mistakes, my parents have made mistakes and their parents before them too. If I focus on these I spend so much time in ‘self-improving/being trapped in a cycle of regret/ not doing it the way my parents did it‘ that I take my eyes off the goal - this moment, this experience, this opportunity to laugh or cry, this chance to skip down the road. Guilt traps us in the past. I want to parent right here, today, in this moment.

I love this quote – it reminds me I want people to treat my children with a fresh slate each day and I too need to start each parenting day with a fresh slate too.

So what words shall we speak of?

Joy

Celebration

Future

It is a joy to have my boys. A joy not allowed to everyone who longs to parent. I will enjoy this moment. This mess that speaks of a home inhabited by small children. Joy in the noise that demonstrates children relaxed, children expressive, children who do not have to silence their thoughts. I will lie in bed at the end of the day and thank God with joy for the minutes, days and years I have been given with these boys so far.

Celebration – every day is a gift. I am not promised tomorrow for myself or my boys and so I will celebrate today.

Future – I will parent with the future in mind. With my hopes for men who will be filled with compassion and strength. Men who will be generous in their actions, their laughter, their friendships. Because while I choose and hope to dwell right here in this moment I am also growing men. For me this is like stopping to smell the roses – looking at the delicate buds, marveling at the flowers but remembering to water that same plant because I hope it will bloom for a good many years more.

This week I started teaching my biggest boy to sew (he made a Christmas gift for his brother) and I sat in the sandpit (in my Sunday dress and ‘pearls’) with my littlest boy. Because I enjoy them, because they make every day worth celebrating, because they are without a doubt the best thing I have to invest my life into for every single day we have one another.

(I realise this is like the longest post ever pretty much I’ve written it for me…. but I’d be stoked if it encouraged you too)

This year I am making more of a conscious effort to have quality moments with my boys. B.M.W.B (becoming the mama I want to be)  is my way of recording and hopefully inspiring other mama’s too.